Off Topic Thursday: The Friend You Don’t Talk to for Ages

20 Feb

(Yes, it’s a week early. But I’ll be on vacation next week so you’re getting Off Topic Thursday a week early!)

I hope this isn’t a solitary experience because I love it so much. Does anyone else have a really good friend that you sometimes go weeks or months without talking to? For me, she’s my best friend.

When I was in high school, I met Hellen (name changed). She was a year behind me in school and we clicked immediately. She was sad when I decided to go to school out of state but we both knew it was best for me. She ended up coming to visit me during my Sophomore year for a weekend and it was one of the most memorable visits I had while in school. She got along with my friends immediately and I’d talked about them enough she felt like she knew them. She didn’t think I was crazy for going to a Spanish language mass and even joined me for a baby shower for a woman I was tutoring in English.

When I moved home, she helped me move into my first apartment. She calls my parents Mama and Papa and started a trend of my other friends doing the same. After I called my parents, she was the first person I told about my engagement. Of course, I wanted her to be my maid of honor. She was the best choice I could have made because she had high expectations for my husband and wouldn’t have joined me at the alter if she didn’t truly believe in us.

Despite being so close, we go for long stretches without talking or seeing each other. And it’s never mattered. Whenever we see each other again, we pick up right where we left off. Nothing in awkward and we’re never angry with each other for the long time that’s passed. We’re just so happy to be together, how could we be mad?

I have other friends who feel like strangers if I go more than a few weeks without talking to them. I have friends who have drifted away because we went too long without speaking and now I don’t consider them friends anymore. But Hellen will always be different. I don’t need her to reassure me that she loves me, I know she does. And she knows I’d do anything for her in a heartbeat. It’s a friendship different from any other I have and I treasure it more than anything.

Until next time, write on.

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5 Responses to “Off Topic Thursday: The Friend You Don’t Talk to for Ages”

  1. Sue Johnson February 20, 2020 at 10:20 AM #

    Hey Sam –

    Great topic and wonderfully expressed. Remarkable isn’t it how you can pick up exactly where you left off, as though no time had passed! I share exactly the same friendship with a friend I made in kindergarten. We’re each the sister we never had and I adore her mother too.

    When she moved to Philadelphia for family reasons, I was heart sick and feared the worse. But we’ve made it work, even though the geography takes some of the spontaneity out of our time together. Our friendship has morphed and changed through the years and adapted to all the major life changes we’ve experienced, separately or together.

    Thanks for sharing. Good reminder of what’s really important in life.

    Have a fabulous vacation! Looking forward to hearing all about it.

    Bon voyage –


    Sue Johnson M 248-408-9668


    Liked by 1 person

  2. nickimags @ The Secret Library Book Blog February 21, 2020 at 6:10 AM #

    I have a friend just like this who I’ve been friends with for over 40 years. We only see each other a few times a year, but when we do it’s so good. Hope you have a great vacation!


    • Sam February 21, 2020 at 6:17 AM #

      I’m so glad other people have this awesome experience as well. Enjoy your friendship!

      Liked by 1 person

  3. Sharon Taylor February 22, 2020 at 10:03 AM #

    I like the definition of a true friend as someone you can call at 3am! I have 3 that fit that category. Two are out of state but it is instant bonding in person or by phone. Like Sue wrote it is going through life experiences together…births, deaths, marriage, divorce etc. Where would we be without our BFFs?? All others are just acquaintances moving in and out of our lives.


    • Sam February 22, 2020 at 10:22 AM #

      That’s a great way to define a good friend. It can be really lonely not to have someone like that in your life. Thanks for chiming in!


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